July? You’re kidding me…

June’s goals
1. Finish BAW (edits and at least start fleshing out the ending).

One goal. One not-that-big goal.

Okay, so it’s not completely true.
I didn’t FAIL. I did finish reading through and doing rough edits. However, once I completed that, I just flat-lined.

And I swear there was a DNR lying around or something. Because there was no life in my pen this month. And it just flew by.

So I got the edits done, wrote the first line of the rest of the damn thing, but haven’t done the major reworking that needs done. So it’ll probably be on this coming month’s list.

I’ve also begun a new venture, which will probably take some of my time up, and I want to start learning computer coding, because it’s useful and could be good for some future plans. AKA, I’m piling more things on my plate than I can possibly handle. And I still haven’t gotten in touch with the local writers’ group.

July’s goals
1. Finish one level of Code Academy – That’s 6 hours of stuff, so it’s a mouthful, but hopefully I won’t choke.

2. Read a new, nonwork-related book. Just one. I mostly have been rereading old favorites and stuff for work. And I’ll even count rereading books that I read a long time ago (pre-accident) and no longer remember.

3. Work on side project of mystery goal.

4. Write a thousand words OR prep a story for submission. Oh yeah, I do that sometimes, don’t I?

I’m hoping lots of smaller goals will help me complete them, now that I’m getting in the rhythm of my new life.

Writing Exercise: 1/18/14

My other stories have been slow in coming. I need to reorganize some things in my life inside my head.

I got practically nothing written this week, but this morning I woke up with a vignette in my head begging to be written. It’s not going to develop into anything more, but it was a nice writing exercise. Of course, one day I’m going to go back and look at all these short pieces and roll my eyes at them and want to fix them up. Also, I need to do more exercises that push my skills, but that’s another story.

This one is just about heartbreak….I guess.

Oh, college life.


I crouched by my bag in front of my dorm room door and searched the pouch where I remembered leaving my key before going to class. Nothing. The sounds of Soul Caliber drifted through the crappy door, and then my roommate, Harry. “So how do you put up with fucking him?”
Will snorted. “What does that mean?”
“I’m just saying. What’s it like?”
“Why, you want to fuck my boyfriend?”
“Um, no.” Even through the door, I could hear the curl of disgust. “Just wondering. He’s so lanky and boney.”
“Well, yeah.” A pause, followed by the curses of one player getting several combo attacks on another. A soft chuckled. “It is kind of like fucking Jack Skellington.”
I stood on shaking legs and stared at the door. But the voices still came.
“He’s aptly name then, huh?”
Will laughed and the curl of unease froze in my gut. “Shit, how did I never think of that before?”
“Obviously because you were so in love.” The eye roll was clear through wood and cement.
“Obviously.” Another snort of laughter from Will.
I shoved my hands in my pocket and curled my fingers around the keys there. Oh, hey, found my keys.
The clatter of controllers hitting the hard floors barely registered. The sound of tussling was not that abnormal, so I slid the key in the lock, thinking I’d call them on talking shit about me behind my back.
Then a groan. Not a ‘that hurt’ groan. Not a ‘don’t hit me there’ groan. But a ‘oh yes, again please’ groan.
I turned the lock and twisted the knob. Pushed open the door.
And yes, my roommate was lying on top of my boyfriend, one hand between them at their crotches, my boyfriend’s legs wrapped around his waist. Harry did something and Will did that groan again, his hips arching up into the touch.
I swallowed down the bile of betrayal, grabbed the doorknob, and slammed the door shut. It was only a moment more to reclaim the key, put my school bag in order, and walk–quickly–down the hall.
Looked like I needed a new boyfriend.
And a new roommate.

Fuck.

Writing Exercise 1/7/14



Another writing exercise, because I couldn’t build up the courage to jump back into the story I’m working on. And I figured writing something is better than nothing. Once again, no editing or re-reading has been done to this piece.


Andy rolled over. The streetlight, filtered through five dollar curtains, cast water shadows across Trey’s dark, smooth skin. He closed his eyes, but when he reopened them, Trey was still spread about beside him, one hand resting on his chest, the other by his thigh, the sheets clinging at his waist. It almost made him look nude.
But he wasn’t. And Andy needed to keep that in mind. Needed to remember that Trey was here because the alternative was lying on hard plastic totes. Because Andy had invited him–as a friend. Because friends didn’t make their friends sleep in dusty warehouses.
Friends didn’t study the slope and curve of one another’s chest as it rose and fell, the sparse hair that gathered thicker near the waist and then vanished beneath the sheet. One little tug and…
And he’d see boxer shorts. Because friends didn’t sleep naked in bed together.
He rolled over, tucking his hands under his pillow. Turning away didn’t hide Trey’s skin, matte in the dimness, anymore than the dark had. But at least now he wasn’t tempted to reach out and touch it. His hands clenched one another. Or at least he thought he had more control to not do it.
He shouldn’t have invited Trey over. But what kind of friend abandoned their buddy without a place to sleep?
The smart ones who have been harboring crushes on their hot coworker.
So not him. Because he was an idiot who gladly invited said crush into his bedroom to sleep beside him. Platonically. Of course. He closed his eyes and squeezed his hand to the point of page. He was the biggest fucking idiot.
“Mmffg.” Trey shifted behind him, and Andy held his breath, waited, but nothing more happened.
Of course. Because the love interest slipping his arm around the besotted fool’s waist in the middle of the night only happened in cheesy romances.
“Mmm.” Trey shifted again, and this time a hand landed on Andy’s hip and slid around to his front, holding him there and drawing him closer as Trey wiggled behind him. Spooning him.
A string of curses, prayers, and hallelujahs streamed through his head before he managed a whispered, “Trey?”
Nothing. Then an aborted snore that rubbed against Andy’s shoulder.
Oh. He was still asleep. Cuddling. In his sleep.
He wished Trey had mentioned this little quirk. He inhaled and closed his eyes, ignoring the reasons and the whynots and just feeling the arm around him, the body behind him, the heat and scent and…well, the boner. Nothing to be done about that (literally, unless he wanted to risk waking Trey up with the motion).
He could always pretend he’d been dreaming about a hot chick or something. Afterall, it was Trey who had started the cuddle party.
Andy pressed his hips back, just enough to feel Trey’s dick press against his crack. He froze. Trey snuggled closer, hips pressing closer, body plastered against him. Wasn’t Trey hot? The air conditioning was doing its best, but still…
Though, maybe it was his pounding heart that was making him so warm.
He exhaled in a rush, then sharply inhaled as the hand on his stomach slid down–oh fuck–and bumped into the Boy Scout troop stationed there. Trey made another sleepy noise behind him and the hand slid up to his chest, once against holding him as Trey wiggled behind him, crotch–hardening cock!–nestling firmly in his crack.
Ohfuckohfuckohfuck.
Trey nuzzled against Andy’s short hair, probably envisioning kissing the crown of some high school sweetheart.
“Mmm,” came his sleepy voice. “Am I turning you on?”
That gravelly question should not have made him shiver, but it did. He also realized–several seconds too late–that the question was a little too keen for someone who was sleeping. He froze.
“Trey?” his shadow whispered.
“Mmm. Yeah, Andy?”

——–



Gay Rom Lit 2013

This was my first year at Gay Rom Lit. I was lucky because I got to attend as a publisher with Riptide Publishing…which means I worked my butt off and they paid for stuff 🙂

But they also let me out to attend sessions and see people and do stuff. Which was awesome. Just being surrounded by like-minded folks was incredible. Because everyone there loves to read and they love to read the stuff I read and write.

There was lots and lots of swag/free stuff and books! So many books.

…and an oddly large amount of Subway eating. I ate its pizza for the first time. Not bad.

But the best part of the week was talking to people about writing. Discussing growing my skills and making connections with people who are willing to help me improve. So now I’m setting aside all my current projects to write a short story so I can submit it and get hardcore feedback, then cry, then hopefully improve my craft.

Thankfully I had a story idea that I found I could develop into something that will hopefully be short. So my new goal is to finish that, then maybe get back to everything else. By then it’ll probably be the holidays. I don’t even want to think about it!

Writing…or not?

The other day I had an epiphany.

I was online after doing some work and checked my mails, my tumblr, facebook, twitter, RSS feeder, private forum, work email, twitter, tumblr…

Wow. I waste a lot of time online.

Twitter is good for networking and just being social with people, so that has purpose. Facebook I use to stay in touch with RL people (and let’s be honest, it takes the least amount of my day), email is important (although I should probably consolidate the 7 email addresses…), but the RSS feeder has plenty of things I barely look at, but that takes time every day to check. And tumblr. Sweet, tempting tumblr.

I started my tumblr as a creative playground. The plan was that when I (or a follower) wanted to do a quick free write, they could go to the site, click “random,” get an image, and then write that story. A few hundred words or so. It’d be a good exercise.

Then my tumblr started focusing on sexy guy images. And I started following more tumblrs. And more. And more. And then I created a tumblr for my writing stuff. And then another and another and another. The problem isn’t the tumblrs I make. It’s the ones I follow. And I like to make sure I see everything, because some great things get posted. But it takes time.

And what’s the point? Are the images inspiring me? Rarely. Entertaining me? Sometimes. Just cute? Mostly.

Sometimes it’s a nice way to sit back and relax. In most cases, checking tumblr takes no more than ten minutes if I haven’t checked in 24 hours (and my computer isn’t being super slow). Not really a huge waste of time. Except when I check every 10 minutes. And then check twitter again.

Obviously these are all just things I use to put off what I should be doing (whether that’s working or writing). But the point is, I complain to myself that I never get time to write, but then I waste all that time on tumblr and such.

It needs to stop. So here’s the plan:

1. Check all my sites 1 or 2 times a day (am and pm), except on weekends, when I get more freedom. (And maybe check tumblr one more time before bed, just to chill.)

2. Write. Every day, at least 100 words. If I don’t feel focused on one of my stories, then I’ll click a random item from my tumblr, write up a flash fiction, and post it on my writing tumblr.

That’s the plan. We’ll see.

Name this aloe!

No, I don’t name ALL my aloe plants. Just Big Mamma, Lucien, Cornwall, and NoName (who had a different name and I forgot it). Once Big Mamma is repotted I’ll take a family portrait and share. But for now, I need help naming my Aloe in a Jar! It’s kind of an experiment to see how it grows and what it does with minimal soil and confined space. But he’s special, so he gets a name.

So, what’s his name? (And yes, aside from Big Momma, they all tend to be male-named.)

ETA: Though no one cares, I named it Aloewisius

In writing news: I’m still editing and failing to write 100 words a day. The last week was rough, so I’m giving myself some leeway. More news as it happens.

Ups, Downs, and Words

I’ve been fairly busy with life and work, but I have done some writing and personal editing. Mostly LHNB stuff, but I’ve also been digging into Kin #1 edits with the hopes to get it out the door sometime in June. (I need to pick which publisher I want to send it to. It’s currently my baby and has 2 more stories in the series…hopefully, so I’m being particular.)

I haven’t even been looking at submission calls. Those tend to be fun and easy, but I really want to get a novel on my resume. Though some poking around tells me this probably will be just a little too short to get a print book. Bah. A novella will do, I suppose 😉

I’ve also been trying to write 100 words a day, with some flexibility for those days that just exhaust me (like yesterday). I’m currently working on a trans* story and I have no idea where to go with it right now. But all the muses are being kinda quiet and mellow right now, so I’m going with it. Good time for editing. And when they have a point to make, the muses will make it.

Word Counts and Weariness

So anyone who follows me…anywhere probably hears a lot of complaining coming from my mouth. I try not to, but right now my body is in an unhappy place and it leads to whining. My recuperation has been a frustrating dance of one step forward, two steps back. I thought I was feeling 90% better and then I got bad news and got dumped back at 75%.

I’m pretty much in some sort of discomfort, whether it’s my lower back, my neck/shoulders, my eyes, my head, or (new this week!) my jaw. The days these complaints are minor, I feel good. Then other days I’m exhausted just by waking up (not even getting out of bed). I’m tired, all the time.

But I’m working (it’s baby steps) on being more positive. Remembering the good things that happen during the day. Remembering the things I can still do.

One thing that helps, some days at least, is a new word count goal. 100 words a day. That’s easy, right? I’ve only missed one day so far (after working a full day and being absolutely exhausted). So it’s easy and feasible and if what I wrote is utter shit, I don’t feel bad deleting it because it’s only 100 words. And most days once I start I feel good and get more than 100. That is a nice feeling, even when I’m just working on a free piece of fiction 🙂

Because even if it’s small progress, at least it’s always progress.

Otters and Silver Foxes

Today was my first day back at my full-time job, although I’m only working part-time at the moment. So I’m dead on my brain at the moment.

I submitted my shifter story to SMP. It’s pretty much the first thing I wrote since the accident, so I don’t know if it’s very good, and it’s not quite long enough, so they might not take it. But I’ll do something with it if they don’t want it.

I’m also currently ignoring my other shifter story in favor of writing a prompt from the Love Has No Boundaries anthology from the M/M Romance group on GoodReads. I have it started, but no idea where it’s going. Some friends keep tossing me pictures of sexy older men for inspiration 🙂

I’ve been really struggling with my depression the past week or so, as those who follow my Tumblr know. It makes it hard to work, write, or just breath some days. But then I have other moments where everything is fine and it feels so freeing it’s wonderful.

Also, a note about aloe plants: They are sturdy sons of guns! I had an aloe plant at work that didn’t get watered or tended to for 3 months and it’s fine. Green and happy as a clam. The one by the window got sunburnt, but it still was pretty well off (although I put it out of its misery). These things are Rambo tough. Inspiring, huh?

Writing. Editing. Repeat.

I’m just going to ignore everything happening with that which rests above my shoulders at the moment.

I’ve been doing a fair amount of editing on old stuff, some which needs major fixes and some which needs (hopefully) minor changes and inserts. But this past week I’ve been working for Riptide and working on new stuff. Or sorta new stuff. Or something.

I finished edits on the Earth Day Piece and sent that in. If they don’t want it, I will probably post it on SmashWords or something for free.

My one shifter story was being completely uncooperative, and then I saw a picture and a friend and I exchanged a few words and I had a different shifter story that needed to be told. I wrote it up, and despite it being shorter than requirements, I sent it in for an anthology. I’m hoping they like it. My original shifter story is still in progress. The damn things either sit there silent or they talk up a storm. I swear.

And because I’m a masochist or something, I signed up for one of the prompts at MM Romance’s Love Has No Boundaries writing marathon. I wasn’t going to. But then this man came up and I just wanted to. Needed to. I hope I can do right by him.

And that’s what’s been going on in my corner of the world.